Running Away is Muy Malo

Have you ever heard of "Fight or Flight"?  Its the idea that when a person is confronted with a dangerous situation their body begins producing adrenaline to prepare them to either attack/defend (Fight) for themselves, or cut and run (Flight) from the danger.  This is meant to protect us in dangerous situations.  Unfortunately, all to often we rely on this in order to avoid situations that can only be dealt with if we remain calm and stay.

READ Genesis Chapter 32:1-32

In Genesis we read about Jacob.  To summarize, when we get the point in the story you just read, Jacob has tricked his older brother out of his birthright, deceived his blind and old father into giving him the blessing (which meant he got all the stuff), run away from the conflict with his older brother Esau.  There are a few more deceptions and bad choices along the way, but those are the ones you need to know.

So, as we read, one day Jacob finds out that Esau is on his way to meet him.  Jacob doesn't know why he is coming, but what he does know is that he had treated his brother shamefully and never tried to make amends for it.  Here's our first lesson.  Do not assume you are right because you are you.  Jacob used that kind of logic to back up everything he did to his brother.  Jacob was always taking care of #1.  Remember how in 1 Corinthians 13 Paul tells us that Love doesn't seek its own ...that means Love is not selfish, or self-centered, or self-concerned.

Ask Yourself (write down in your journal if you are keeping one)
-Did Esau have any reason to believe that Jacob had changed or was any different than he had been?
-Do I really love the folks I say I love, or am I just using them to further my own interests?
-Jacob was worried that Esau had held a grudge against him.  Are you holding a grudge against someone that would keep you from having your relationship from being restored?
-Are you running from your problems?  Is there someone you care about that you have let the relationship die because instead of dealing with it you ran from it?

When Jacob finally decides to stand his ground and not run, he's fighting none other than God.  He fights all night, and ultimately doesn't win the fight.  The fight is over because God says so (and he jacks his hip just to make sure Jacob remembers who he wrestled with.) What Jacob does get is a new name and a new start. Even though it looked like a loosing battle, and even though it was a battle he could never win, Jacob stays in it telling God he won't let go until He receives a blessing.  Then God changes Jacob's name to Israel (pronounce Yis-ra-el).  Israel is derived from the Hebrew word, Sa-rah which means: persist, exert oneself, persevere.  There is a truth found in his new name that we can take a lot from.  Any problem we face, and relationship we want the most out of, we must "exert oneself" in order for it to be fixed or work.  Our problems are not going to just go away, and this is most true when it comes to problems we have with other people we walk with through life.

Ask Yourself
-What is the significance of Jacob wrestling with God? 
-Why do you think that God put Jacobs hip out of socket?
-Are relationship supposed to have struggle?  Is it realistic to believe they won't?

THE POINT:

   We do not exist in a vacuum.  There are always going to be people around us who are going to have an impact on us, and we on them.  Secondly, we live in a world where problems are going to happen.  That, problems will happen, is as much a part of life and eating and breathing.  When you mix relationships and problems together, you get a volatile (dangerous, unstable) mixture.  The struggles we have with others can be either destructive, or inspiring.  Good or bad, our relationships leave a mark on who we are.  Much as I dislike arguments with my wife, I know her more deeply, clearly, and intimately because I have struggled with her.  Arguments and fights will come, but will you submit even those to the Lord?  Will you trust that, by His leading, you will know the right things to say, how to say them, and be humble enough to apologize for hurting the other?  Will you leave open at least a window, if not a door, for reconciliation?
   Let this motivate you.  God did not shut you out, though you have treated Him wrong.  He loved you for who you are, not for your actions, behavior, or lifestyle.  If you are grateful for this, then you should be willing to show God your gratefulness by acting the same.  Good acts, behavior, and Godly lifestyle come after Love.  Not before.
   This week, if there is someone you are avoiding struggling with, will you by God's power commit yourself to do the right thing, take a stand, and say this relationship is worth fighting for, regardless of what has gone before?  Will you look at yourself and freely see your own faults so you can blamelessly, and with love, approach your loved one? 

LOVE part 1

***Remember that you might want to get your own bible out and look up the passages in it.  You may have a different translation which might help you to understand things better.  Also, if your the write-ee type, you might want to answer the questions in a journal.  It'll help you process, but will also give you something to go back over later for encouragement!***



LOVE!  Talk about the most important word in the history of man that is also the most over-used, under-used, pointlessly-used and de-meaned (that is, value taken out of the meaning) words ever.  A guy named Rob Bell once put it really good, he said something like, I say I love my wife; but I also say I love tacos?!  Seriously, try this out.  Come up to Ashton next week and be like, "What do you think of the wings and texas toothpicks at Koppe Bridge."  Ashton will say something like, "oh man!  I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE the wings and texas toothpicks at Koppe Bridge."

Now the thing is, I can live forever and not have wings or texas toothpicks from Koppe Bridge ever again.  Not to say I wouldn't miss them, but it wouldn't crush me.

Spending the rest of my life without my wife would crush me.

So, what's the deal?  Why do we make the meaning of love so cheap?  Do you ever feel that we have started using love with our friends, families, and others in the same cheap way we use it to describe bands, food, and movies?  God is very clear in the Bible what Love is and what it really means.  One place the meaning of Love is literally explained to us is 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.  It says (don't forget to look it up also):

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude.  It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  Love never ends.  (english standard version)

If you were at Youth this week, you were there when we went through this verse highlighting words that describe what Love is not, and then what words Love is.

Do 1 of 2 things (or both if your so inclined).
- Using two different colored highlighters or pens, in your Bible highlight the words that describe what Love is not in one color, and then what love is in the other color.
-Write out 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 on a piece of paper or in your journal.  Highlight or underline the words that describe what Love is in one color, then do the same for the words that describe what Love is in another color.

Ask yourself: what do the words that describe what Love is not have in common?  What do the words that describe what Love is have in common?

How do the things that Love is not make you feel when that kind of behavior is directed at you?
How do the things that Love IS make you feel when that kind of behavior is directed at you?

Something you may have noticed when you compared all the words describing love, what it is and what it is not, is that Love is comprised of things that build people up.  Love has nothing in it that tears people down.  There is no place in Love for mocking, wishing ill on someone, being impatient with people.  You wouldn't say to someone, "Man, my boyfriend is SO great!  He shows me how much he loves me all the time by yelling at me, making fun of me, mocking my values, and getting upset with me because I'm "always in his way".  He's just wonderful, sigh."  That's crazy!  And, if you read that and your like, "what?!  what's wrong with that?"  Call me and lets sit down face to face...your in a world of hurt.  But, I think you get my point.  Love doesn't destroy people's will and heart, it builds them up and protects them.

Ask Yourself:
-Is it easy to love people?  When I look at the words that describe what love is...is love easy all the time?
-Place yourself in this situation.  You just got home from a bad day at school.  You have a ton of work to do, chores to get done, and you have a bit of a headache.  Your little brother or sister wants someone to play with him and is being a little bit annoying.  What is the loving way to handle this?

Love never fails.  If you are anything like humanity before you, then you know your love is not perfect.  That is why Love needs practice.  You show your love to others in more ways than you know by getting up off the ground and trying to Love right again when you fail.  That is the thing about Love.  Love is so good it hurts; Love is so good it grows; Love is so good its worth the work to know what it really is; Love is so good it never fails...never ends.

I show my wife live when I bring her flowers randomly.  My wife KNOWS I love her when she is sick from being pregnant and I get up at 2 in the morning to run to the store to get her Gatorade and sprite because she's dehydrated from being sick all day.  She KNOWS I love her when I sacrifice my own comfort to take care of her.  Is it easy?  No.  Does it fly in the face of my selfish desires that are reinforced by a culture that tells me constantly that comfort is the only important thing in life?  Yes.

-How does Love happen?
-Why does Love hurt?  Why is it hard?  Why doesn't it just flow magically like in the movies?
-Am I willing to actually commit to knowing Love, and learning to Love the best I can?  What do I think that will look like?

THE POINT:  The point is that Love did happen to us.  Jesus came to die on the cross for our sins and then rose from the grave defeating death so that we could know Love.  1 John 4:8 says, "God is Love".  It also says in verse 7 that when we love our neighbor (family, friends, parents, strangers) we are "born of God and knows God".  Next time you think that Love is this easy thing that should just magically happen with the right person, remember that the path of Love that Jesus showed us led to the Cross.  That should encourage you!  We know from what Jesus did for us that Love is worth it!  No matter what the cost!  Today, do you desire to know God more?  Are you willing to learn to Love and ask God to teach you?  Love is worth it. 

CHARACTER

This is too help you go further in our devotional from youth group at Wellborn Baptist.  Some suggestions for you:
1.) Consider using a Journal to write down your answers to the question prompts.
2.) Use your own bible to look up the bible passages.  This helps you to learn to navigate your Bible, and also may help you gain some insight into the passage meaning.  Your translation may be different from the ones I have used (New American Standard Version).
3.) Pray and ask God to guide you as you go through this.
4.) Don't worry how long or quickly you work through this.  Take the time you need and feel led to take.

Character comes from the inside out.  What does the bible say about Character?

First, the heart.  You have heard the phrase, "Let your Heart lead you."  The Bible says that the heart is not a good thing to follow.

Jeremiah 17:9

"The Heart  is more deceitful than all else, And is desperately sick;
Who can know it?
I, the LORD, search the heart, I test the mind
Even to give each man according to his ways,
According to the results of his deeds."

Ask yourself:
1.) What does it mean that my heart is sick?  What is your initial inclination about the decisions you make?
2.) What does it mean that no one can know the heart?
3.) Some may say they know their heart.  If this is so, then why do we do bad selfish things that we know are wrong and sinful?

The Bible says that Character comes from within:

Matthew 23:27-28

"Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!
For you are like whitewashed tombs which on the outside appear beautiful,
but inside they are full of dead men's bones and all uncleaness.
So you, too, outwardly appear righteous to men, but inwardly you are
full of hypocrisy and lawlessness."

What we do to the outside can not change what is inside.  No matter how much you decorate the outside of the tomb or the grave, no matter how beautiful it may be, it doesn't change that fact that inside is death, corruption and decay.

Ask Yourself:

1.) what are somethings that people (or me) do to hide the fact that deep down they are only concerned with their own interests or pleasures?
2.) what makes what good things a person does actually good?
3.) what does it mean to be a hypocrite?  How do hypocrites make me feel?

The Bible says that once we have accepted Christ, we become a Temple for the Holy Spirit

1 Corinthians 6:19

"Or do you know that your body is a temple of the
Holy Spirit who is in you,
whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?"

Also, the bible says that Jesus has defeated death

1 Corinthians 15:56-57  (also read verse 50-56)

"The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law;
but thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through
our Lord Jesus Christ."

Ask Yourself:
What is the difference between the power of this world and the power of the Holy Spirit?
What is the difference between and Temple and a Tomb?
What are you making a home for inside you?

The Point
We are home to one of two things: death or life (the Holy Spirit).  We come into this world born into sin and fallen.  From the moment of our birth, our hearts are sick with sin and can not be trusted.  This is why Jesus say that no one can come to Him except those lead by the Holy Spirit.  If our hearts could lead us to Him, there would be no need for Him to give us grace by defeating death.
Ultimately we are either a tomb, or we are a Temple.  Too many people make themselves look good on the outside, so much that it is hard to believe that in reality, on the inside they are still a tomb.  Think of the Taj Mahal in India.  It looks like a palace and it is very beautiful.  But, ultimately it is still a tomb for a queen.  The queen is still dead and always will be.  Nothing can change the fact that ultimately, it is a monument to death.
A Temple is a house for God.  It is a monument to the idea that inside lives something that never dies.  Jesus offers you the gift of life.  He offers to transform you from a tomb, a monument to illness and death, into a Temple where His Holy Spirit lives inside of you giving you life here and in the future.  This means that the good things you do come not from your own weak strength, but are product of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23) and a sign of life...not death...within us.
If you haven't asked Jesus to change you from a tomb to a temple, is the Holy Spirit moving you to let him?
If you have, are you doing your part to make a good, peaceful home or the Holy Spirit?
Are you the real thing?

FIRE

Fire is used in a variety of contexts in the Bible.  As in life, Fire is used both in positive ways and negative ways.  Fire keeps us warm, but fire can also burn our house down and leave us out in the cold.  A good fire helps the forest by clearing our brush and replenishing the soil with vital nutrients.  A bad fire can kill everything in the forest and leave a decimated, erosion scared landscape behind.  Fire is one of the greatest forces of nature that man has ever tamed, but people will literally jump out of 80 story windows to get away from it.  Fire is powerful.

Let's start with fire used in a negative light in the bible.

James 3:5-7 (NASB)

So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things.  See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire!
And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell.

It doesn't take much to get a rumor, lie, or untrue boast going.  Remember "white lies" (the okay not so bad lies) and "black lies" (the ones that are really bad)?  How many awful rumors get started by a little white lie?  In fact, aren't we good at making our "black lies" look like "white lies" so if we get caught we can act like we are innocent (by "we" I mean society in general).

<span>Ask Yourself</span>

-Have you ever told a lie in order to fit in, feel better about yourself, or get back at someone?
-Has anyone ever told a lie about you in order to fit in, feel better about themselves, or get back at  you?
-Why do you think little lies can grow into such ordeals so quick?
-Is it ever okay to bend the truth?

Often folks who lie, lack wisdom.  People who have wisdom know what to say, or when not to talk, in order to avoid lies.  People who have wisdom do not care what others think about them, only what is right...what is principled.  They understand the damaging effect of sin.  "Wisdom is better than weapons of war, but one sinner destroys much good."  -Ecclesiastes 9:18 

Now, lets look at fire used more positively.

Acts 2:1-4 (NASB)

When the day of Pentecost had come, they were all together in one place.
And suddenly there came from heaven a noise like a violent rushing wind, and it filled the whole house where they were sitting.
And there appeared to them tongues as of fire distributing themselves, and they rested on each one of them.
And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak with other tongues, as the Spirit was giving them utterance.

In this case fire is used as a sign of God's blessing.  The folks gathered in that house that day were Jesus' disciples and other followers of Jesus.  They had come to recognize the divinity of Jesus and accept that He had died for their sins, so that they may forever exist with Him.  The "tongues of flame" were symbols of God accepting them and putting his Holy Spirit inside of them.  Often, in the Bible, the Holy Spirit is associated with a flame.

<span>Ask Yourself</span>
-Why do you think God associate Himself with fire so often in the bible?
-Read the rest of Acts Chp. 2.  What effect did the Holy Spirit have on all the people who came to listen to the disciples upon whom the Holy Spirit had fallen?

Now, lets look at Fire in one more light. 

Deuteronomy 4:23-24 (NASB)

So watch yourselves, that you do not forget the covenant of the LORD you God which He made with you, and make for yourselves a graven image in the form of anything against which the LORD your God has commanded you.
For the LORD your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God.

Hebrews 12:28-29 (NASB)

Therefore, since we receive a kingdom which cannot be shaken, let us show gratitude, but which we may offer to God an acceptable service with reverence and awe;
For our God is a consuming fire.

It is a common misconception, a lie even, that God is alright with whatever you do as long as you pay lip-service to loving Him and "be good".  The problem is, most of the time what we mean by "be good" is very relative...that is it changes from person to person, situation to situation.  What we may think of as good when we are in a comfortable place, might change when we find ourselves in a group of peers or friends who are doing what we said earlier in the day was not right.

Hear this: God LOVES You.  That does not mean He is alright with you or what you are doing, if it is against His law or takes the place of priority in your life from Him.  God created us to follow after Him, to do His will and to love Him the way He loves us: with all of our being, all our words and all our actions.  Ecclesiastes, which was written by King Solomon, says this, "This only have I found: God created mankind upright, but they have gone in search of many schemes.' (Ecclesiastes 7:29 NIV).  God created right, He created us to go a certain way, a certain direction in our life.  But, we have gone our own ways, trying to find easier quicker ways to find healing of our hurts.  Or, because we are just misguided and think that there is a more pleasurable, satisfying way to live life.  The problem with this kind of thinking is that, since that is not the way God created us to live, we hurt ourselves and we hurt our relationship with God.

But, the good news is that God is a consuming fire, who purifies us, destroys our sin, and restores us back to Him.  When making metal, you take the ore that the metal is in and heat it up to an incredible degree of heat.  This burns away all the impurities in the ore, leaving only pure metal.  That is how God works with us and our sin, he burns them away until they are no longer there.  But, first, you must admit to Him that you need purification and that His direction is the way you want to go.




-What in your life have you made an idol?  What do you find you are prone to setting up as a priority in your life before God?  School?  Friends and Popularity?  Freedom from your parents?  Money?
-Why do you think it means that God is a Jealous God?  Who does He want first in your life?
-How do we show our love for God?  (look up Luke 10:25-37; Deuteronomy 6:4-6)
-If we have sin in our life, what can we do for God to take it away from us? 



In life we find a struggle of power.  Which power are we going to allow to rule our lives?  The power that tears us and others down by our words and actions?  Or, are we going to allow the Power that renews and restores us to rule our lives?  Fire can either save us or kill us.  Which fire are you going to allow in your life?

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